Raleigh & Alyssa

We are Raleigh and Alyssa. We have been together for the past 12 years and married for 7. We adopted our daughter Charly in 2019. Alyssa works for a social service agency supporting families and Raleigh works for a non profit as a construction site manager. Charly goes to preschool and spends her days playing. We love having fun as a family with kitchen dance parties, playing pretend, camping, traveling, visiting friends/family or generally being silly. We are looking forward to growing our family and we are excited to get to know you!

About Us

We met serving at a homeless shelter while in college at Anderson University. Each time we volunteered, we would make up excuses to stay later than other volunteers so we could spend time getting to know each other. After a few months, we started dating and four years later we got married. Our relationship is fun, loving, goofy, committed, and respectful. We both feel extremely lucky to have each other.

 

Choosing Adoption

Our life forever changed when we adopted our daughter, Charly, in 2019. We struggled with infertility for several years and instead of pursuing further treatments, we chose adoption. All we wanted was to be parents. The love we have towards Charly is a truly indescribable feeling and something we never knew we could feel towards a person. Our once normal evenings of binge watching television shows, making last minute plans, or hosting game nights, now look a little different. Our new normal is taking walks to nearby parks, making family dinners, reading books, and staying outside playing as long as we can. Even more special is that we have been blessed with a great relationship with Charly’s birth family as well. We are so grateful Charly has so many people who love her.

We could not be more excited to grow our family through adoption again. Charly has been helping us prepare the baby room and loves talking about adding a “baby brother or sister.”  We are all looking forward to the baby snuggles and being a family of four.

Alyssa on Raleigh

I cannot imagine parenting and doing life with anyone other than Raleigh. Raleigh helps keep me grounded and our relationship balanced. Raleigh has challenged me to grow and pushed me to be a better person. Anyone who knows Raleigh best knows he is consistently pursuing to understand himself/others, always choses honesty, fiercely protective of his family, is the greatest at explaining board games, and above all else he is the best dad to Charly.

Watching Raleigh as a dad to Charly is nothing short of incredible. Charly and Raleigh can be found hunting “monsters” in our basement, eating popsicles, listening and dancing to music, or playing pretend with various toys. No matter life’s challenging situations or long work days, Raleigh does not show any change in patience or involvement with Charly. I know Raleigh will be the best dad to our next child as it is so evident with how he loves Charly.

Raleigh on Alyssa

 Alyssa is first and foremost a nurturer. She has always concerned herself with the needs of others over herself. It comes through very strongly in her line of work as a social worker. But even outside of work, she just has to make people feel comforted. She likes to see the best in people and in situations. But just because she is a nurturer, that doesn’t mean she can’t also be strong willed. She has a strong sense of justice, and if you were to wrong someone that she loves she is not afraid to take action and protect her own. She is headstrong and it makes her a great leader. I have never met someone with the mix of a personality that she has. She is both a lover and a fighter, nurturer and justice seeker, willing volunteer and strong willed leader.

Now I know all husbands say this about their wives, but I truly believe that Alyssa is the best mother around. Every time I see her interacting with Charly, I can’t help but think that is what the universe had planned for her. I have seen her laugh with Charly and nieces/nephews in the good times, and cry with them and support them in the bad times. She also comes from an amazing family that is so ready to welcome another little one into the mix!

Family

 Our friends and family play a big role in our lives. Alyssa’s siblings both have families and weekends are often spent traveling to spend time with them and her mom. Charly spends every Wednesday getting special one on one time with Grandma (Alyssa’s Mom). Alyssa’s Mom is very active with taking trips to the zoo, playing games, baking sweets, taking library visits, the list goes on and on. Charly is obsessed with her cousins and is always looking forward to the next time she will see them.  On Raleigh’s side, this will be grandbaby number four and we spend time visiting them through the year. Everyone is so excited to add another little one and will be very involved with our child’s life.

Charly

 Charly is 3 years old and every bit of a 3 year old: curious, stubborn, independent, loving, happy, silly. Charly loves spending time outside, dancing, singing, reading books, playing pretend, being with her cousins, and watching her favorite Disney movies. Charly is becoming interested in babies and will often be the first to point them out when we are in public. We anticipate Charly to have a “nobody messes with my brother/sister but me” attitude.

Parenting and Openness

We have talked about parenting styles throughout being together. Fortunately we have had some incredible role models in our own parents who have taught us how to build an encouraging and loving home. We always try to approach parenting as a team. We hope to raise Charly and our future child to see the beauty in all people, to have confidence in themselves, to be independent, and that they will always have us to support and cheer them on throughout their life.

As parents we have learned one of the best things we can do for any child is help them feel loved. More specifically we have learned through our adoption journey that the love they feel should not be limited to our love alone. By having an open adoption, our whole family has been blessed by seeing the deep love that Charly’s birth family has for her. It is our hope to develop a similar relationship with you. We promise that this child will always know you as someone who loves them and they will know the respect and gratitude that we have for you.

Alyssa
  • Nothing is better than sweatpants, popcorn, and a fountain pop.
  • I enjoy fishing during the summers with my family.
  • I run so I can feel less guilty about what I eat.
  • I enjoy both “roughing” it and getting dressed up.
  • My brothers are 9 and 13 years older than me.
  • One of my favorite things about summer is going to festivals and eating all the fair food.
  • I went to college to study something math related and then fell in love with social work.
  • I can get pretty obsessive with games where I want to play them over and over.
  • When it comes to sports, I can be one of the loudest fans even if I don’t know the teams or the rules.
  • I can be competitive and do not like people to “go easy” because I am a woman.
Raleigh
  • As a camp counselor, I once chased a bear into the woods to keep it away from the campers.
  • Growing up, I played ice hockey and was even able to play in Canada a few times.
  • In high school I got my fifteen seconds of fame by being on Oprah.
  • Alyssa has never seen me without a beard.
  • I am the second oldest of five siblings.
  • I worked for nearly 5 years in the social work field and then abruptly made a switch to a construction role.
  • I like to think I am a pretty handy person, but really that just means I am good at looking at tutorials on YouTube and I’m not afraid to try fixing anything.
  • I use the name “Chuck” when ordering food because people often get confused by my first name spelling.
  • 80% of the things I say are quotes from movies that I saw as a child. Quotes from old Adam Sandler movies make the most frequent appearance, or any movie with Will Ferrell.
  • I had to get stitches in my chin three times, all before the age of 12. Once was from falling while ice skating, once from flipping over my handle bars on a bike, and once while trying to jump over a large Tonka truck with my Razor scooter.
Charly
  • To delay going to bed, I will say “I tink I forgot to tell you something….”
  • I like running around in my “Mike Wazowski” costume (from Monsters Inc.) whenever I get a chance.
  • As a baby the Kacey Musgraves song, Rainbow, was always soothing to me and could stop my crying in an instant.
  • If you want me to belly laugh, say anything preceded by the word “poopy.”
  • When others may be emotional, I will bring them a blanket and one of my favorite stuffed animals to make them feel better.
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